How Does A Girl Like You Not Have A Boyfriend?

What does every girl  thinks she wants to hear when they are talking to a new guy? For mosts it that  you are perfect, what he's always been looking for the girl of his dreams. It's a phrase thats meant to make you feel safe and "worthy" of his attention. In reality, at least for me its disarming. In that instant mentally going out on a tangent with a list of everything in my mind that I think are my huge personal flaws. I'm not perfect in no way shape or form, I'm just me. Which in many cases is extremely confident and rarely ever outspoken. But that is a phrase that could stop any good conversation in its track, all of sudden my charismatic self clams up and I'm no longer the free spirited blunt girl who tells you exactly how she feels. 

Well this was the case with Mystery Man #1. He was funny and sweet and we had a lot in common. We talked for a couple of days about the stupid things going on in our lives. We talked about our days off and then about work. It wasn't in the boring way you drone on about your boring day and the stacks of papers that you stapled. We teased each other mercilessly and flirted heavily. And then the bomb dropped. It's not the first time that a guy asked me and its not the last. But none the less it just made me feel as awkward as the first time a guy had asked, HOW DOES A GIRL LIKE YOU NOT HAVE A BOYFRIEND? How on earth are you supposed to answer that question? 

How a normal person would answer that question: 

Awkward laugh, followed by a witty joke "Oh well I hadn't met you yet". The response came naturally because your initial interpretation of that question was that it was his way of calling you perfect and he couldn't imagine how a girl like you hasn't been snatched up by another guy. 

How my mind answers that question:

That's about how far i'd go to get away from that question!

It all starts out with a disclaimer: Well, it's sort of a long story, but I'm not really the girliest person in the world, which sort of makes me sound like a tranny. Which I am not.. But I'm picky and stubborn which is a hell of a combination. I have terrible taste in men, so I never trust my gut. Sometimes I swear I don't know what I'm looking for and when I do think I've found it I've usually made a terrible mistake. And the list of things that have gone wrong in my dating life continue to run through my mind. None of which I actually say.. well I only made that mistake once. Surprisingly in that situation It actually didn't turn out all that bad, we did end up still going on a date. But thats not the point, the point is that as soon as a guy eludes to the fact that I'm perfect, or a catch.. it's like instinct number one is to run as far and as fast as I can. 

For Mystery Man #1, that was the nail in the coffin. It was the moment when all the signs came crashing down, he wasn't going to be the man of my dreams. Because at the point I didn't feel like I could be the girl of his. Well hey, we win some we lose some.. on to the next suitor. Stay tuned for more stories on the ins and outs of online dating.